Monday, August 11, 2008

poppy seed muffins and the pregnant woman


I've been told many times that I should be a blogger, so I guess I will try it out. In a way, this will be a good way for me to get all my ramblings and weird thoughts out and perhaps it'll make me feel MUCH better? Who knows!


The other day my hubby and I went on our weekly adventure to Costco to pick up random things, and I wandered on over to the Muffin area, you know, where they have those HUGE muffins, in chocolate, banana nut, coffee cake, etc. Well, they always seem to have it in three different choices, but I can never find a combination that I truly love. To be honest, the only kind I really like are the poppy seed ones. So I was kinda throwing a fit, cursing under my breath that all I wanted, was to request for them to give me a pack FULL of just the poppy seed muffins. I had missed a rack while passing by and my hubby, not far behind me, saw them. Sure enough, he came to my side holding a pack of ALL poppy seed muffins!!! I mean... WOW! How did I miss that?!? The first time ever, that I've seen those muffins with just one flavor, and it was mine.. all mine! Needless to say, I started to cry. Right there, in Costco, I discreetly wiped at my tears, took the muffins and walked away.


I've noticed a lot of things like that happening lately. Not exactly like that, but just, well, me crying at the drop of a hat. I know, I know, I'm pregnant, so it's okay, but even BEFORE I became pregnant.. I cried a lot! I don't do it on purpose, it's just who I am. My feelings literally are on my sleeve, as I wipe my nose and face all over it. I don't know why I don't just carry a box of kleenex around with me! I really should invest in that, but then I'd be one of THOSE people. Who have tons of USED kleenex in their purse, 'cause they don't have a garbage around to throw it away. That's so gross!


I know that once my baby boy is born, I'm gonna hafta deal with a lot of gross things, but honestly, I don't wanna deal with it quite yet. I see plenty of gross things on a regular basis, I am dreading the woes of motherhood.


We've had a house full of baby animals for the past couple of months, and I sit there and watch them, and it frightens me so. An example, we have our mama cat that got pregnant shortly after we moved back to Arizona from Texas. We got rid of two of the kittens, but have not been able to get rid of the other three. Boomer, our mama kitty, as been soooo patient with her babies, but lately, as they've gotten bigger.. I think they are around 4 or 5 months old now, she's been getting irritated. She'll be dozing on the couch when one comes up to nuzzle next to her, I can see the reaction in her face, she gets SO ornery!! One, the baby tries to feed off her, which they did for a long time after they were born and now that they have full on teeth... OUCH! Boomer will just sit there and hiss at her own baby kittens, even get so angry as to literally claw at them to bugger off! Yet there are other times, where the kittens will be just walking by her and she'll grab 'em and start grooming them, while they fuss and cry underneath her probings.


Is that what motherhood is going to be like?! I am worried that this baby is going to be around SO much, that I'm gonna get annoyed and just hiss and not want him to cuddle with me. But I just have to think of the good things, right? How could a mother NOT want to just adore and cradle her beautiful baby boy? I know that whatever happens, it'll happen for the best and we learn as we live, right? Right.


Anyway, this blog became a lot longer than I expected it to be... but I do tend to ramble, so maybe this WILL be a good thing. I called my brother, asking him what to blog about, he said for me to do just every day types of things. Then we began to talk, and I told him my poppy seed story, he then told me to blog about it. Thanks Matt. I do feel a little bit better, just.. ranting about whatever. Hopefully whoever reads these, don't think that I'm TOTALLY insane! But thanks for reading!!!

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